Warning: Book Groups can turn nasty!
When I conjure up images of book groups, I think of a few highbrows sitting around a warm fireplace in very polite discussion of either classic literature, or contemporary literature (but NEVER popular lit). I don’t associate book groups with any sort of nastiness, at least, not until I read this article from NYT. The article says, in part:
Yes, it’s a nice, high-minded idea to join a book group, a way to make friends and read books that might otherwise sit untouched. But what happens when you wind up hating all the literary selections — or the other members? Breaking up isn’t so hard to do when it means freedom from inane critical commentary, political maneuvering, hurt feelings, bad chick lit and even worse chardonnay.
After reading the above quote, it seems like book groups should just be festering with problems like infighting and backstabbing. And let’s not forget that literature encompasses a lot of issues, especially the “hot button” issues like politics and religion. So when you get a group of people together to talk about a book, that deals with these issues (and many more), there are bound to be disagreements.
Of course, as the article mentions, it didn’t always used to be this way:
The literary societies of the 19th century seemed content to leave the drama to authors and poets, whom they discussed with great seriousness of purpose. Some book groups evolved from sewing circles, which “gave women a chance to exercise their intellect and have a social gathering,” said Rachel W. Jacobsohn, author of “The Reading Group Handbook,” which gives a history of the format plus dos and don’ts for modern hosts.
I always thought of literature as a “respectable lady” (figuratively, of course) and images conjured up of those literary societies of the 19th century only reinforced that idea. How things have changed! Also, it appears that people’s idea of exactly what a book group does has become a little blurry. The article mentions people who want to use the group as a form of therapy (to talk about their problems), and even to network for business (this is the worst of the worst, in my opinion!).
On the other end of the spectrum, there’s one group mentioned in the article that set such strict rules that members began to feel stifled. So there is definitely a middle ground that needs to be sought among all members of the group.
My personal opinion? Book groups should be for fun and having stimulating conversations! If a group doesn’t meet that criteria for someone, then they should leave – life’s too short to be miserable in a book group, and books should never make you feel miserable to begin with.
My question to all of you is: Have you been in a book group that turned nasty? Tell us about it in a comment below and feel free to change names to protect the innocent! Don’t be shy!
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